They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
