I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I didn't notice because vodka
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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