Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I think pants incapable of making pants work
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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