if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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