Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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