i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
