yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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