I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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