I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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