I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
