i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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