so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
