the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
