i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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