HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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