Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
