Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Randomize
