dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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