READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
