There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
