that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My hand turned me down
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I lost the right to judge tonight
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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