you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Randomize
