If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We talked him into tasing himself.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
