I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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