College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I wish i was in the wii world.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
