HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
