sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
