I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
