So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I believe in your delicious
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
