That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
