is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
