The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Randomize
