The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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