Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Boobs are out for the taking
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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