I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
My penis needs a shock collar
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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