Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
