I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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