I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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