I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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