Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
