just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
