I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Randomize
