So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
