doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
