If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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