He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
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