he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
