If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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