Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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