belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
